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Flotsam and Jetsam

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Flotsam and Jetsam

Author Archives: Paul Christopher Walton

Les Fleurs du Mal

21 Monday Jul 2014

Posted by Paul Christopher Walton in Poetry

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Songs

 

 

The ancient stones of cities past,

Lie scattered all about.

The holy runes, once so great

are only now in doubt.

I look to find myself in this

But all I find is sin.

I feel, I see the echoes here

of life-my origin.

 

Les Fleurs du Mal call me on

In soft incessant dreams;

They weep, they cry, they sign, they die –

And me I hear their screams.

The Goddess Leona’s here

Upon the sun bleached walls,

I watch the runes upon her tomb

And softly hear her call.

 

O, Reader, save yourself from this

Before my tale you hear,

Else stand a hypnotised man

As Leona slowly appears

You, Reader: yes my brother,

You’ll be her victim too.

You’re nothing but a hypocrite

So pay her what she’s due!

Speed Awareness

06 Sunday Jul 2014

Posted by Paul Christopher Walton in Fiction

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Flash Fiction

 

 

The confirmation had arrived. The authorities were allowing him to avoid points on his licence in return for his attendance at a speed awareness course at Wroxton Airfield.

 

Ed was to report at 8am and be available for a minimum of six hours. The paperwork told him to bring food and drink if needed. It also made it quite clear that he was to concentrate fully on the course. Any lapses such as surreptitious texting would result in immediate expulsion.

 

The day arrived dismal, dark and freezing cold. Wroxton consisted of decaying Nissens, fractured concrete and tumbleweed. The car park was already full of boy-racer brands to which he added his Subaru.

 

He found the waiting room reeking of sweat and damp and glanced at his bung- eyed mean looking co-students.

 

Suddenly a neatly turned out gentleman appeared with a clipboard:

‘You are all here because you have broken the law and society has seen fit to extract its penalty by your spending time here with me. I’m Mr Lightber, the facilitator; and remember, keep your mobiles switched off.’

 

They took their seats and so began hours of listening to lectures and answering questions.

 

First, the course became restive because of the relentless barrage of Highway Code Trivial Pursuit and then aggressive when Mr Lightber announced he wanted to start the next module.

 

‘Now listen, you lot, you’ve not only broken the law but have killed and injured other people. Some of you have even managed to kill yourselves. That’s right….you’re dead.

 

And for those who thought hell was all cauldrons and boiling oil, you are now discovering that we are more sophisticated with our guests

 

You may as well calm down now, because you’re going to be doing this course for, ahem, eternity!’

Ed looked at the Subaru through the window and closed his eyes.

 

From Anderson to Zest

30 Monday Jun 2014

Posted by Paul Christopher Walton in Poetry

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In Memoriam

 

A Lexicon of JSA- for his birthday

 

A       The Andrew Scholar of Canterbury Quad

B       The Castellan of Blackroot

C       The Colonel of Cadets

D       The Denizen of D2

E        A Fully Paid Up Member of The British Empire

F        Fingers in Pies (Lots of)

G       Little Green Books (Essential Reading Matter)

H       The History Man who married his History Woman

I        The Inspiration of our Enthusiasms

J        The Jovial Master of Connections

K       The Keeper of the Archives

L        The Lichfield Street Archaeologist

M       The Governor of Mayfield

N       Naseby’s New Model Neighbour in the Saab

O       The Catalyst of Equal Opportunity

P       The President of Pipes

Q       The Distiller of News from all Quarters

R       The Clubbable Rotarian

S        The Commissioner of Scouts

T       The Merchant Taylorian

U       The Unsurpassed of Self Deviating Narratives

V       The Vade-Mecum of Marian Life

W       The Walsall Observer

X       The Defining Standard for EXtra Mural Activities

Y       The Serial Yomper of Cader Idris

Z       The Very Zest of Men

For Ceders

26 Thursday Jun 2014

Posted by Paul Christopher Walton in Poetry

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In Memoriam, Loss

If kind thoughts were currency, you would indeed be rich, old friend,

But all that tax would piss you off big time, we both know.

If saucy, earthy thoughts were subject to capital gains, you would be clobbered,

But you wouldn’t care: you would pay and willingly.

The ordinary, instinctive pleasures of life were more than sufficient for your big heart;

The thanks and smiles of friends; the gossip and the comedy of people getting up themselves.

 

But, stay friend, before you go, did I tell you what you meant to me?

That rarest gem of a loving father, a devoted mate and faithful friend who could drive surprisingly fast when the pressure was on and the flight was closing,

A one man charity service with an ever full Passat of needy people or stuff for needy people,

A proper gentleman in his posh overcoat against the cold on late night pick- ups,

A brilliant raconteur with a wicked turn of phrase and an eye for the humanity’s funny side,

That sympathetic attitude which made your famous undercover work and promotion a little tricky,

The world’s best dog walker and putter- up of shelves for the hopelessly inept like me.

 

Dearest Ceders, you would hate all this fuss, but this is one party you can’t escape, I’m afraid,

Today you are our shining, brilliant Celtic star, and we your loving support cast are basking in your light.

Just this once, my friend, you must take your bow…………………..

 

Songs: ‘Ever a good, gentle Sovereign Lord’

17 Tuesday Jun 2014

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Anne Boleyn, Songs

 

I dreamed of kings and queens

When I was young,

The laughter and the music of the court,

I knew that love and crowns

One day I’d have, and be

The subject of the poet’s thoughts

 

I came to court, his grace

Soon courted me

With promises, which his grace could not afford

He pledged to me

His love I’d have and be

The favourite fool of my good lord

 

The crown I wear I won

By guile; but now

The victim of royal love withdrawn

I know our love

Tomorrow has to be

Murdered where it was born.Image

For Graham, Elaine, Helly and Me

10 Tuesday Jun 2014

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Business poetry

The early years were easy years of growth:

The energy of childhood’s spurt and spring;

Inventing new traditions like flasks and flowers

And finding fertile joy in everything.

The middle game seemed far more sweat than swot,

With sacrifice of threatened piece and peace,

The darkest night of Enterprise’s time,

All progress checked and pinned with no release.

And so the final reel, the transaction scene

Where money changes hands and with it lives,

All the bitter twisted limbo feeling

Of leaving, but not leaving still survives.

 

You found, you build, you inspire and grow,

But selling out costs more than you can know

 

Poems of Place: An evening in the Wirral

29 Thursday May 2014

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Jo Malone, Poems of Place

A drive of affluent gravel

Off a side road in Old Cheshire.

Evening: the sky trifled blue and grey.

The house, milk pebble-dashed and happy;

The smile, welcoming attentive.

Through a postern door we walk

Past a squad of trainers on parade and other sporting kit,

Past the bathroom (with Jo Malone in residence)

To the terrace and its un-manicured and lived on stones.

I contemplate the birdsong, and the ghosts of jets

Note the swimming pool’s ectoplasmic jelly

And beyond, the trees of darker greens and one of purple,

The colour of Malbec , the house-red

I sip in mindfulness.

The day I didn’t meet David Abbott: a tribute

19 Monday May 2014

Posted by Paul Christopher Walton in Essays

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Advertising, David Abbott

 

August 16th, 1977 is one of those significant where-were-you-dates, because it’s the day Elvis died. In my case, I was waking up from a hard night’s sleep on a friend’s floor in Cricklewood when I heard the news on the LBC breakfast show. Actually, this day already held significance for me, as it was to be my first day as an adman.

French Gold Abbott was then one of London’s hottest hot-shops and I had been offered a place in their first graduate intake as an account planner. As all who have a connection with advertising soon discover, this world likes acronyms and everybody knew the agency as FGA.

David Abbott was the A of FGA and its celebrated creative director. An Oxford educated writer with Robert Redford looks, David was not just the acceptable face of advertising, but also its most intelligent voice.

That morning when I arrived at FGA’s office in North Wharf Road just on the edge of the west London badlands, the penny dropped that my agency had been bought by a big American firm called Kenyon and Eckhardt who had merged it with a fading UK establishment brand called Colman Prentis and Varley. Amid the obvious continuing merger chaos, David Abbott was nowhere be seen; nor was Richard French (In France, apparently!) but I was told I would be meeting Mike Gold, which later that day I did.

In fact, it was quite some days before David did appear, and when he did, I was lucky enough to have an hour’s induction with him in which he shared his Desert Island Ads. Softly spoken, charismatic and clever, there was also sadness in his eyes.

Soon I was immersed in the crazy world of 1970s advertising trying to rebrand Watneys beer and flog Swedish crispbread, but I was also sensing that all was not well in the world of FGAK&E. There was no still no sign of Richard French, and there was gossip that David Abbott was unhappy. As rumours spread, David wrote a celebrated ad for Campaign that featured the agency letterhead with his name crossed out and which carried the Twain inspired headline: ‘Rumours of my departure have been exaggerated’.

In fact they hadn’t been, and it wasn’t long afterwards that FGA staff were gathered together to hear the news that David would indeed be leaving to set up a new shop with an old university friend.

So Abbott was gone, French wasn’t coming back and even Gold soon would be going. Was this –perhaps with hindsight – excellent character building stuff? Certainly in the few moments I hobnobbed with David, there was tremendous value observing his panache with wordplay, his facility for rhetoric and his comfort with long copy at time when visuals dominated advertisements.

By 1980, FGA had ceased to exist but three new brands now arrived in its wake and needing acronyms: French Cruttendon Osborn, Gold Greenlees Trott and perhaps the greatest of these three, Abbott Mead Vickers.

Paul Christopher Walton

May 19th 2014

 

 

 

 

Poems of Place: A Sunset at Warminster

18 Sunday May 2014

Posted by Paul Christopher Walton in Poetry

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Poems of Place

 

 

The clouds became oppressive slate,

As the sun retreated beyond our view

In one fighting blaze.

Far off in the coll, the garrison lights

Lay scattered like jewels.

Our silence was broken as the long grass

Danced and the trees shuffled in the breeze

And all around us the voices of shadows,

The tenants of this land, the soldiers.

 

Warminster, July 1979

 

Viking flash fiction as seen at The British Museum

16 Friday May 2014

Posted by Paul Christopher Walton in Flotsam, Reviews

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‘Egil took a hazel pole and went to a rock facing inland. Then he took a horse’s head, and put it at the end of a pole.

Afterwards, he made an invocation saying: “Here I set upon this scorn pole and turn its scorn on King Erik and Queen Gunnhild”

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