The BP Portrait Awards
You told us to lock eyes,
Get up close and personal;
Be inspired by Hogarth’s words
And if in doubt, swipe right.
But I didn’t expect a face-to-face with Fairfax
Over the Sancerre and sea bass.
But the Roundhead was a better with pike blocks than with banter
And sadly for me he sat impassively
As I munched on burrata and asparagus,
So I talked instead with Karen.
You might have warned us Dr. Schama
That we’d been invited a Game of Thrones theme night dinner
Where House Stuart showed once more how if you win, you lose
And three big names – Strafford, Laud and Charles
Looked down at us with hauteur and as yet their heads,
As we sat below the salt
Contemplating life’s greatest dilemma:
Of being wrong but romantic;
Or being right, but repulsive?